


The Tree House

by NotYourDarlings



Category: SPN, Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Childhood Friends, Childhood Friends AU, Implied Internalised Homophobia, M/M, Sadness, literally nothing happy here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-02-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:46:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22781989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotYourDarlings/pseuds/NotYourDarlings
Summary: Sometimes the kindest thing to do is to say goodbye, but that doesn't necessarily mean that its easy.A letter to say goodbye.
Relationships: DeanCas, Destiel
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	The Tree House

_ Look, Cas, I’m sorry _ ,  _ alright? I wanted this just as much as you did. And we both tried to make it work. It just… It was never going to work out. We both knew that. It was just that neither of us really wanted to admit it.  _

_ And I’m sorry that I let you get your hopes up. I’m sorry that I got my own hopes up. We should have been sensible about this- but we were both young, and reckless, and, I suppose, naive. It doesn’t mean that what we had wasn’t special. It was. It was so special- and I don’t think I’ll ever have anything that good again.  _

_ But it was never going to work. _

_ Do you remember that time we got stuck in the tree house? We must have only been seven or eight. You kicked the ladder down when you were climbing inside. For the first few hours, it was fun. We decided we could just live up there for the rest of our lives. If the squirrels could manage, so could we, right? Plus, we had your Game Boy, that bag of potato chips that was about six months old from the last time we were up there, and you were wearing that ridiculously large coat that Michael bought you from London- what more could we need? We convinced ourselves that everything would be fine then.  _

_ What I’m trying to say is that we’ve always had a tendency to be a little gullible. We were kids then, but we were barely more than kids when we tried to make this work. I’m not saying that what we had, what we felt, wasn’t love. I’ve got no doubt in my mind that it was. It just wasn’t a love that was built to last. We should have seen that. Maybe one of us did, but at the very least we both chose to ignore it.  _

_ We lasted about an hour in that tree house. I know you’ll insist that it was longer. I’m pretty sure that you tried to convince me we were up there for eight hours once. You were stupid enough to try and eat some of the chips, and it all went down hill from there. I knew there was something wrong with you once you got quiet. You always gave me a running commentary of whatever game you were playing - hell, you still do that - but you stopped. You looked kinda gray too. And even though it was the middle of July, you started shivering. Who knew that expired potato chips can make you sick so quickly?  _

_ We’ve had a good couple of years. It’s been the best two years of my life. You’ve shown me things, taken me places, that I never even knew existed. None of that has to stop if you don’t want it to, though I can’t imagine you’re going to want very much to do with me after this. The bottom line is: you deserve better than me. You deserve better than this. You deserve somebody that is proud to show the world that you belong to them, and they belong to you. You deserve better than somebody that won’t even take you on a proper date because they’re scared that somebody will see and all of a sudden their biggest secret is out. I want you to be happy with somebody better than me.  _

_ I damn near lost my voice screaming for somebody to help us get down. Of course, we chose the one day that both of my parents were away at work to venture what felt like hundreds of feet up in the air. Apparently the neighbours weren’t home either. Sometimes, I think I’m invincible. I think that I can do anything and everything and there’ll never be any consequences. Which definitely isn’t true, because jumping out of that treehouse hurt like a son of a bitch. And I hated having to wear that stupid cast on my leg. I didn’t think I had any other choice though, because you looked like you were a ghost and I was convinced that you were gonna drop dead and I’d be stuck in a treehouse with the corpse of my best friend. I’ve got to admit that it was pretty bad-ass that I still managed to pick up the ladders and prop them up for you even with a broken ankle.  _

_ I’ll always be there for you. Whenever you need me, you know that I’m right there. I always will be. I just can’t keep you from having what you deserve. I can’t give you that, so I’ve got to let you go. I’ve got to do what’s best for you, even if it breaks my heart.  _

_ So, I’m sorry, Cas. _

_ Spread your wings, Angel- I’m letting you go. _

With a deep breath, Dean creased the piece of paper in two and stared at it for a few moments. He’d already spent the past two hours convincing himself to go through with this. Once he’d slid the paper inside the envelope,  _ Cas _ scrawled on the front, Dean nodded to himself. 

“Dean, are you coming or not? Sam’ll be here to pick us up any minute.” That voice sent a chill down his spine. He placed the envelope down on Castiel’s pillow.

“You go ahead and travel with Sam, Cas. I’m gonna make my own way there.”


End file.
